The windmills were so grand. I’m sure you have seen them
before in movies. Any movie with a road trip in it usually has a clip of them
driving through a patch of huge, white, energy making windmills. That’s them.
We took plenty of pics and were so amazed by the sheer volume of them. The
field went on for a few miles with 20+ windmills in each section. Later in our
trip we saw a tractor trailer hauling just one of the blades and it was longer
than the trailer itself. It’s a miracle what man can do.
Just as the sun was setting over the horizon, we crossed the
border into Texas. We were so happy we had a little dance party under the
welcome sign. At this time we only had a few hours till we hit Amarillo. Texas
was so beautiful the land was so open and so clean. Aside from the few murder
houses we passed, the state was amazing. The only problem we had while driving
was the locusts. Do you know the statement “Everything is bigger in Texas.”?
Well it’s true as we were speeding along we were hit by what at first we
thought was a toddler from the car in front of us. It turns out it was a locust
and the blood splatter was a little less than horrific. At one point in our
trip we drove through a plague of locust and my front bumper was never the
same.
It was 8pm and we were almost in Amarillo. We pulled over at
the rest area before we hit the city to change clothes and freshen up. Our
first stop in Amarillo was Cadillac Ranch. Story has it a millionaire who
collected the high end cars passed and his children buried them nose deep
standing up. Nowadays people go there to spray paint their names on one of the
luxury cars. We arrived when it was pitch black. We armed ourselves with our
flashlights and I had my taser prepared. We were in shorts and flip flops and
as soon as we took that one step too far from the car we suddenly became aware
that we were in said footwear and were surrounded my rattlesnake holes.
I am terrified of snakes let alone ones that can kill you.
We walked hastily and carefully. It was so dark you could not see the Caddies
until you were right on top of them. Yes, that was the scenario for acres and
acres, and we walked through it in flip flops. The ground was littered with
empty spray cans and plastic bags. Every time I heard a bag rustle in the wind,
I sent a pray up, had a minor panic attack, and squeezed Carissa’s hand a
little tighter. We etched our names into the cars and took plenty of pics then
we realized we were not alone. There was some guy at the last car doing
whatever, in our scared minds we thought he was preparing an alter to sacrifice
us on.
Once we got safely, bite-free, back to our car we headed to
the club area. In Amarillo there is no certain area for clubbing like Philly we
had to go down side streets and almost on the outskirts to find the club. We
walked in and it was dead, but the drinks were cheap and the music was good, so
we stayed. About a half hour after we arrived this couple came in and took a
spot next to the dance floor. The girl approached Carissa and asked her to join
her on the dance floor since her boyfriend would not. Carissa immediately
declined and turned her towards me. By this point in the night I was ready to
dance. So I took her hand and I escorted her to the dance floor. This girl was
already tipsy and she was wearing six inch heels. Thank God I know how to move
on a dance floor, but really extra thanks that I have the strength to grab
people before they hit the floor. Those shoes and her inebriation were not a
good combo. Every other spin her ankles would wobble and I’d grab her in a way
that it looked like a sweet move. The whole 10 people at the bar were quite
impressed with our performance.
Then things started getting weird. I danced by my lonesome
to a song and went into the restroom. I came out to see my Mini Me dancing to
the song that I just danced to. He was about a foot and a half shorter than me,
and oddly wearing the exact same blue shirt/white shorts combo from Old Navy. As I walked back to the table there was a commotion
at the door. Somehow a toad or two made their way into the bar. I’m not talking
about ugly people, I mean real toad. Rib bit Rib bit!!! We took that as a sign
to leave.
Being as classy as I am, I changed my outfit at the car in
the parking lot. Good thing I had on my boxers that said “Shake it.” We began
our drive to Albuquerque it was about four hours out and it was only 10pm. At
one point in the final stretch we pulled over to admire the pure amazingness of
a Texan sky at night. We were awestruck. The stars at night were truthfully big
and bright deep in the heart of Texas. The only other times I have seen a sky
like that where in a planetarium and watching Planet Earth on the Discovery
Channel.
We were about thirty minutes from Albuquerque when we
started looking for lodging. There were two hotels off the next exit we were
going to check out, but they both had no vacancy. There was motel named Sunny
Skies off the very next exit. We pulled in and pulled right out. There was no
way we were staying there. It appeared as though Janet Lee would have been
safer at Bates Motel than us if we stayed there. We finally found a Motel 6 two
exits down and crashed for the night.
The next day we slept in a little bit and headed downtown to
Rudy’s the best BBQ place in all of New Mexico. I made Carissa partake in a
brisket sandwich. It was Heaven; their homemade sauce is to die for. After our
lunch we hunted down the one thing I had to show her. Mind you I have been to
Albuquerque quite a few times for business so I knew my way around the area.
Just a few blocks away stood the World’s Largest Arrow. It sits in the middle
of a Super Fresh parking lot and is about 300’ tall. I love kitsch things and
this made my day. We gathered our memories and souvenirs and hopped back in the
car and headed toward our middle destination, Los Angeles!!!
We had no idea what kind of storm laid ahead of us…
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